In years past during my digital marketing career, when I attended corporate holiday parties the highlights were…

The chocolate fountains.

Colleagues dancing.

The senior leader of our group who told us all before we walked in, "Don’t eat like pigs." An unexpected, but memorable pep talk.

Spending the whole night with the three to four people who knew me best at the company. The people who truly got me.

To contrast, as I take the "so many holiday parties, so little time" approach to networking this year, there are no chocolate fountains. Thankfully, there’s no dancing AND I can eat whatever I want, as long as it’s gluten-free.

That said, the most powerful, visceral change this time is my comfort with talking to anyone and everyone—because I know who I am and what I’m contributing to the people in my life. I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished this year—so I have a lot to talk about! And those who know me even just a little know that I…ahem…like to talk.

Part of stepping into my worth and discovering my confidence in networking is also knowing that I don’t need to talk the whole time to build a connection. What a relief to re-learn that I build deeper relationships when I put "The Rachel Show" on hiatus to follow my mantra for 2019—LISTEN.

The practice of deep listening has been a focus for me this year and it has shifted the way I lead workshops, the way I show up for my clients, and who I can be for strangers. When I’m present and generous, I can help them make the connections and note the possibilities I’m seeing for them.

This mindset shift has been a game-changer for both my motivation to network (on rainy, cold evenings in venues so far from Brooklyn), and in my expectations of what will come from those events.

No matter what these connections will bring to my business or my life, I know I will learn more about people. What motivates them. What keeps them stuck. What they want from their lives. What they’re willing to release. All things that bring me energy—inspiring me to write, coach, and help people change their lives.

As you attend— parties this season, I encourage you to use these as networking opportunities to tell your authentic stories, to listen and to be present—removing all expectations that this afternoon or evening will make or break your career or your business. Have fun! Don’t judge yourself or others for unsmooth dance moves—and please, if there’s a chocolate fountain—indulge. Nobody ever regrets that decision.